Euroblog part 4!

The trophy this year is a little weird. Hmm. Anyway, onto the next one!

FRANCE- Sebastian Tellier 'divine' (sp) Hmmm... all the FEMALE backing singers have fake beards, and he arrived on stage in a golf cart-cum- beach buggy. And he's holding what seems like an inflatable, see-through globe. It's obviously not accurate, as you can't even see the magma and stuff, but I guess you can't have everything. Hmm.... I don't think France are taking this very seriously this year.

Yeah.... just, hmmm......... I can't think of any other way to describe it.

AZERBAIJAN- 'Day after day' by someone who'se name I missed. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I think this winged Eurowhite guy is either a eunuch or wearing very, very tight trousers. He has Eurowhite contact lenses and Eurosilver hair. There's also a guy dressed in black who is sitting on a big black throne. They're pretty good singers, actually, I wouldn't mind them winning (apart from the screeching at the beginning from the eunuch, which seems to have made a comeback) but I could do without the undulating 'devil' and 'angel' dancers. Is this some lame attempt at a heaven and hell theme? Wait, what happened to the throne? It seems to have vanished while I was typing. Wogan doesn't like it. I'm kind of ashamed that I do.

GREECE- Kalomira 'Secret Combination' wearing pink with guys in black suits with white shirts, who were holding her up on a silver pole. Yeah.... Ooh, the return of cowbow tassles (pink ones). This is really rather unimpressive. it's kind of just a factory-made R'n'B song, in all honesty. Hmm.... where did the giant purple heat some from. And where did the majority of her dress go? I miss things when I type, obviously. I should learn touch-typing. Another epileptic fitter, where are the St. John's Ambulance?! These people need to be checked over! Oh, good, it's finished.

SPAIN- Portugal will vote for them. Obviously. Rodolfo something. Er.... someone dressed as Elvis just planed 'old mcdonald' on a kid's toy guitar. What's with the Turkish (emphasis on the ISH) dancing? Like France, and obviously Ireland, Spain doesn't want to go to the expense of hosting this next year (and people say we don't take this seriously, and Spain submits rubbish like this?) I'm sure I just heard the world 'a-ya-ya'. CHICKEN DANCING!!!!!! I'll be surprised if Portgual votes for that, to be honest :S

SERBIA- The song is called 'oro'. Two of the dancers are dead (at least, they're lying on the ground and are very still). The singer is in Eurowhite (obviously). There's a woman holding a violin. That's hopefuly. Oh! The violin apparantly brings dead people to life. There's someone else with a lute and someone with a tinwhistle or something, and the dead people are slowly undulating (for want of a better word) slowly around the stage. Maybe they weren't dead, maybe they were drugged? Hmm, maybe her dress isn't Eurowhite. Actually, I think it's Eurowhite with a Eurosilver floaty thing over the top. A bit unimpressive, I'll say.

RUSSIA- (and two more songs to go) This is where bloc voting will really come into play. All of those former USSR countries are going to vote for Russia. (I missed the song title, sorry) EUROWHITE!!! Damnit! And another violin. I think someone paralyed his legs, he's sitting on the floor. As it the violin player. Or maybe Russian people are just very short? Oh, he stood up. And he had a tealight. Maybe it's his pet? He's not wearing shoes! How unhygenic is that?! MICHAEL FLATLEY ON ICESKATES! I didn't even notice the ice. It's not actually Flatley, but he's wearing iceskates around a guy with no shoes. It's kind of entertaining waiting for his toes to be cut off.

They sadly weren't.

NORWAY- Missed the song title. They're wearing dark blue. Good for them! No Eurowhite! It's kind of generic, to be honest. Not very memorable. Pretty Beyonce or something. I don't really have much to say about it, but I reckon it'll do quite well. This'll be scandanavian bloc voting in action again, I reckon.

Euroblog part 5 will be the results, so I'll sit back and watch the rubbish in between. The voting has just opened for 15 minutes so I'll watch the recap stuff in the meantime.